Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize
