I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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