Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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