Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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