I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize