i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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