Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize