You're completely useless in the revolution.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
