bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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