I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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