Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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