If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Randomize
