I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
