Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
