we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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