pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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