I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"