omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
