Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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