If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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