i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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