Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
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