real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
