my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
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I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
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When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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