brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
