you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
