I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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