who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize
