Define "chronic" masturbator.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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