D3 body, D1 cock
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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