I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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