I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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