there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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