i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize