I want to walk on stilts...naked
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize