THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
NoShamevember. You game?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
This couple is walking their pig around campus
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
