Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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