I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
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