i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
