Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
