Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
