NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
