Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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