So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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