Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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