I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found puke in my bra..
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
try to milk me bitch
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