The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Randomize
