So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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