I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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