so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
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I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
why is half of my head shaved?
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